


Nightmare

by Raya_Varran



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Blood Drinking, Burns, Dean Winchester Whump, Evil Sam Winchester, Eye Trauma, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, M/M, Mutilation, Pagan God Dean Winchester, Pagan God Sam Winchester, Temporary Character Death, Torture, being nailed to an object with big iron nails, nails being pulled
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-10
Updated: 2019-03-15
Packaged: 2019-04-21 02:38:12
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 7
Words: 6,634
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14275095
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Raya_Varran/pseuds/Raya_Varran
Summary: Based on Steffi's Pagan Gods Verse.A demon attacks Dean at home. Dean manages to let Cas escape but gets knocked out in the process.He then wakes up in a shed, tied to a table.I pray that Dean will forgive me for bringing him this nightmare.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [SillyBlue](https://archiveofourown.org/users/SillyBlue/gifts).



Dean was sure this is his favorite thing to do with Cas. His beloved was laying in his arms and nuzzling his chest. They were still blissed out and cuddling. Neither one of them was speaking and they were on the border of sleep and wake. Dean loved it.

He heard some noise from outside, but Dean didn’t find panic in it. It was probably Sam trying to let the animals do what he’s asking them. Sam wasn’t that good with chickens, though they really seemed to like him.

It was only Sam, Cas and Dean at their home right now. Emma had to visit a battlefield far away from their home. Sam had told him that Jess had wanted to go to Cas’ village to buy something. Gabriel… Dean just hoped Gabriel was far far away.

It was quiet and peaceful and he let out a happy sigh.

“Mhmmmm, I love you.” he heard Cas mumbling sleepily. Dean couldn’t help but smile.

“I love you too.”

Of course, all good has to come to an end.

 

“Dean! Wake up!” Dean hears his brother call from the hallway. There was panic in his voice.

“What’s going on?” he calls, immediately alert. Dean protectively puts his arm around Cas.

“Dean?” Cas mumbles a little timidly.

The door opens. “Put some clothes on, we’re being attacked!” Sam hisses back as he enters. He quickly shuts the door.

Who in the name of that absent Jotun that is his father is so ridiculously stupid to attack a deity in his own home?

Dean quickly puts on clothes and urges Cas to do the same. Sam looks away, so Dean is the only one who notices Cas walks a little funny, which isn’t only from their time in bed. It breaks Dean’s heart to see that Cas is afraid.

The sadness turns into anger. How dare they bring fear into his house? This won’t go by unpunished.

“How far away are they?” Dean asks his brother.

Sam groans. “They’re already inside. I lost them in the kitchen.”

Dean blinks. “You _lost_ a demon?”

“Them Dean! There’s more than one!”

“Dean?” a small voice asks.

Oh, right, Cas. He had put on a brave face now, but the god saw through it.

“I had to warn you somehow, okay?” Sam snaps. He looked afraid as well. “They’re really strong, Dean. There is no way that they’re normal ones.”

“Why haven’t called for me earlier?”

“I was hiding from them, but then they disappeared.”

Dean forced himself to remain calm. He gave Sam a quick _You did well_ smile and then turned to Cas.

“My love, you have to go back to the monastery. I’ll return to you as soon as possible.”

Cas knew Dean would be able to handle one flimsy demon, but Sam’s fear of what had entered the house seeped into Cas as well. “I don’t want you to get hurt. I don't want to lose you.”

“You won't lose me, Cas. Now please, get to safety.”

“Promise me, you’ll be okay.”

Dean hugged him tightly. “I’ll be back before you know it”

Cas raised his head and kissed him.

“Dean, send Cas away, now!”

“I’ll be fine, beloved. Now go.”

Cas did. Just in time, Cas stepped through the hearth.

Behind Dean, someone laughed. "Who was the cutie who was with you, Dean?"

Dean turned around to answer the Demon as two others stabbed him in the abdomen and slammed his head with a poker simultaneously.

The god lost consciousness.

 

 

Dean wakes up in a shed. The smell of burned meat and rotten wood is entering his nostrils. He groans. There is a blindfold covering his eyes. He is tied spread out to a surface. He feels liquid drying on his skin, but isn't sure whether it's his own blood or paint.

The noise from a door opening and closing.

"Sammy?" he asks.

"Yes, Dean. It's me."

Dean felt the relief washing over him. "Did they forget to tie you up as well?"

A chuckle and suddenly he feels a sharp pointy object against the markings above his belly button. 

"Uh... Sam?"

The object pressed harder. 

 

"No, Dean. I didn't forget to tie myself up."

"Wha- ?"


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm probably implying all the things you think I'm implying. Sorry.  
> 

Cas crawled out the small fireplace in his own room. In different circumstances, he would’ve noticed how small it was, but the voice of the demon was still in his ears.

_Who was the cutie who was with you, Dean?_

Cas shivered.  All he could think about right now was that Dean was in trouble.

How could he help him? Could he even help him? For all Cas knew, Dean had already defeated the threat. But what if he hadn’t? O God, what if they got him? What if they’re dead?

“No.” he said to himself out loud. “Stay calm, Cas. Dean has promised he’d be fine.”

Wait. Had he though?

_“Promise me, you’ll be okay.”_

_Dean hugged him tightly. “I’ll be back before you know it”_

He hadn’t promised he’d be fine.

Cas noticed another bulk of discouraging thoughts coming up, so he sat down on his knees and prayed, but to what god, he didn’t know. He didn’t care if it was Michael or Dean who would fight of the demons, as long as his beloved and his brother would be safe.

 

Sam had cut slim lines over the white markings on Deans belly. The younger god showed no mercy, nor acknowledged his brother's pleading.

“Sam, this isn’t you!” he said again, but Sam ignored it.

It went like this for some time, like Sam had to paint every marking he had crimson with his blood. Perhaps that was what was happening.

The cuts were deeper at Dean’s ankles and wrists. He felt blood dripping down his cheeks as well.

Dean lost consciousness again.

 

When he woke up again, he wasn’t wearing a blindfold anymore, though one eye refused to cooperate. The sharp pain there told him that he had been cut there as well.

He was no longer strapped to a table but tied with his hand behind his back to a pillar. There was a circle around him and there were sigils all over the walls, floor, and ceiling. Like before, none of his powers are working, apparently because of them.

“You know how long I’ve lived in your shadow?” he suddenly heard his brother say. Sam walked into his vision, causing Dean to hold in his breath. Sam’s skin was as dark and grey as ashes and his mouth was forming a wicked smile at the moment.

“The Great Dean and his brother. You know how long I’ve waited for this moment? To see you fall? I’ll be so happy when I finally get rid of you.” Sam said assembling a variety of different objects.

“Sam, this isn’t you! It’s the blood talking!” Dean tried again.

Sam only huffed. “You’re hoping so bad it’s just the blood, don’t you, Dean? That your sweet little brother isn’t about to kill you?”

“Sammy, we’ll get you out of this mess. You just need to listen to us.” Dean pleaded again.

“Listen to you? You and mom and… Dad? To have this random girl move in with us? At least I got something useful out of her.”

Dean tried not to connect the dots, telling himself that Sam didn’t kill Jess.

“To have your miserable daughter live with us? Not to think of your whore who has rotten your brain. You’re so messed up in the head already.” Sam continued.

Dean had closed his eyes already and was silently asking for help, praying to his father, mother or daughter. Even to Gabriel.

_I need help guys. Sam isn’t himself._

Sam slapped Dean out of it. “The place is warded, Dean. You won’t be heard and you won’t be able to escape.”

Suddenly the door opened. The demon.

“Hello, Lord Dean. Welcome to your humble prison.” he said smiling so happy with himself.

Dean just wished he could choke that smile off of him.

“Who are you? What have you done to Sam?”

The demon just grinned creepily and placed his hand on Sam’s lower back. Dean shivered again.

“My name is Azazel.” the demon said as if he’s doing Dean a huge favor by just telling him his name.

That was the only thing he would tell Dean for a while.

He pulled out a chair and just sat there and stared at Dean’s naked form. Dean didn’t want to show submissiveness but pulling his legs closer to his body to hide his junk, so he stared back, hoping he looked unafraid.

Sam started adding small sigils to the circle on the floor. When he had moved close enough to Azazel the demon softly pet his hair once and then smiled creepily again.

“Sammy, I think we’re missing an ingredient. We have his own blood, a cat’s tail, the ashes from a family’s hearth, his mother’s womb-”

Dean turned pale.

“But what we’re missing is his broken heart.”

Sam looked a bit confused. “I told him the truth. What else do we need to break his heart?”

Azazel smiled again. “You’re not his heart, Sammy. Yes, you’re his brother and he would die for you a thousand times, but… you’re not the one who is his heart. We need to find who is his heart and…”

The demon added a dramatic sigh there like he saw Dean shaking and actually pitied him.

“Unfortunately we need to break that person.” Azazel finished after he got enough satisfaction from Dean’s distress.

“No…” Dean uttered, “No, Sammy, please…”

Sam just sighed annoyed by the delay.

“I’ll go get him.”


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So uh... I fixed the rating and some spelling mistakes.
> 
> This fic is gonna be nicknamed Amara because it's gonna be dark.
> 
>  
> 
> Again, Dean, I'm so sorry. I'll bake you a pie.

Dean struggled against his restraints, but the sigils had toned down his power. Almost every marking he had was bleeding and if he would have a mirror he would probably see human eyes as well.

Azazel had put on a smug smile. That smile told him that everything was going to plan.

They sat like that for a long time. Azazel was the first one to look away and break the silence.

“Sammy is a very obedient boy.”

He then looked back at Dean, hoping for a reaction, but Dean tried to keep it to himself.

He didn’t know if it worked or not because Azazel already continued.

“Of course it took some liquid bloody courage, but I love how it turned out. I mean, you were awfully easy to knock unconscious and then all we had to do was threaten your brother that we would hurt you.”

Dean huffed in response. “So you manipulated him into drinking blood? Like that will actually work out well.”

“It will, Dean.” The demon said smirking, “One chug and he already admitted that he actually can’t stand you or anyone else in your pantheon. You should have seen poor beautiful Jessica after he was done with her.”

The god clenched his jaw. “There is no way that Sam would have done that…”

Azazel ‘s eyes twinkled in amusement “Oh, but he did. It’s a shame that you’ve unconscious these last few days. It was so amazing to see Sammy become his true self. He finally saw that he would rather be powerful that have a family and I am so _so_ proud of him.”

“Shut up.”

“He was the one bringing up this spell, you know. The spell that will give me your powers. At first, when Sam said that I wasn’t allowed to kill you, I feared he was going back on his decision, but then he brought up the spell.”

He looked at Dean as if the god was a child and a buffet at the same time.

“There is no way that Sam can do what you do, so he had prepared the spell years and years ago, but he never had a chance to find the translation to the last page and quite frankly there was never a good moment to attack you.”

Dean tried to ignore him.

“Then I came along and I knew the language of that page and I told Sam the sad truth.”

He sighed sadly again. “Only someone who is not bound by blood can receive those powers. Now, Dean, I’m sure we won’t have to dig deep to see that we are not related.”

Dean tried to focus on the pain instead, anything to keep Azazel from messing with his mind.

“Obviously he regretted having to kill Mary, but you need to crack a few eggs in order to make an omelet.”

Focusing on pain didn’t work and Dean froze. “Sam would never do that.”

Suddenly the demon was very close to Dean, trailing his hands over Dean’s shoulders to his chest.

“Oh, but he did!” he said grinning “He enjoyed it, Dean!”

“You son of a -”

Azazel interrupted his blasphemy. “Before you say anything else, I’m telling you now that if you work along, your precious won’t die.”

Dean tried to hide his fear. They were going to hurt Cas anyway, no matter if he worked along or not, but at least then one of them will make it out alive. Best case scenario.

Worst case scenario they both die.

Suddenly Azazel’s hand went further down.

“Now, fertility god, we need something else for this spell.”

“Don’t you dare.”

Azazel gagged his mouth with a piece of cloth and softly squeezed his junk. “Like you can stop me.”

 

Sam climbed through the window of Castiel’s room. He at first wanted to come through the door, but he figured that people would notice that he’s not a human. He remembered that Dean could appear mortal, Sam was not as powerful as Dean.

Sam hated that he had to drink blood to come even close to Dean’s capacity now.

“Dean?”

“No, it’s me. Sam.”

Cas immediately was up.

“Is Dean okay?”

“No, he’s not. We figured that you being near him would help.”

Cas already was putting on clothes and shoes, when he noticed Sam’s skin.

“Have you been drinking blood?”

Sam looked away. “I had to, okay? Dean is unconscious and someone had to do his job, but I can’t do that without a little extra power.”

Cas didn’t look convinced but nodded anyway. “Where’s Dean?” he asked, as he tied his laces.

“At home. I came here running.”

“Why?”

“Dean controls the hearth portals. I don’t, so I had to run.” Sam snapped.

Cas put his hand on Sam’s shoulder. “It’s okay, Sam.”

Sam mumbled a soft “It’s not.” as Cas stood up to write a note, telling he was okay and that he was gone because he had an emergency with a friend of his. Jimmy would know that he was visiting Dean. Jimmy had even looked worried when his brother had told him about the attack.

Cas decided he was ready to go and went to stand next to Sam.

“Let’s go.” he told the god.

Sam smiled and helped him climb down.

 

Azazel had left the shed with the god’s sperm. Dean was happy that he was alone. There was no bliss or anything just anger and humiliation. He pulled his legs up closer to his body. Dean hated how humiliated and scared he felt right now. If that asshole ever dared to touch him again-

Suddenly he sensed a familiar presence. Never before had he wished that Cas was far away from him. But there he stood in the doorway. His beautiful face going from concern to fear and worry.

He immediately stepped away from Sam as he saw Dean gagged and tied down, but the younger god would have none of it. They wrestled for a second as Sam tied Cas hands together on his back. Cas was fairly good at defending himself, but fighting a six foot four god was too much.

Dean was screaming through his gag as Sam hauled Cas up to sit him on a chair. More ropes were tied around him and then it was done. Sam stood back and went to get Azazel.

“Dean, are you okay?” Cas asked softly. He was shivering again.

Dean wanted to nod, but he just couldn’t lie to that teary face, so he shook his head.

“I’ll get you out of here, Dean. I promise.”


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I promised Steffi I would post this yesterday, but I had just watched Infinity War and it gave me more rage and feels than the season 13 finale, so I think I have a fair reason.
> 
> Aaaaanyway, Imma just leave this here. I'm sorry Dean and Cas.

_Oh God in Heaven, please, I beg you to save my love. Holy Michael, please help us defeat this demon._

Cas had been in some pretty difficult situations in his life, but he had dealt with every single one of them. He would deal with this one as well, even though this situation was worse that difficult. Not even when Cas had walked through the land of the dead had he been so scared. He had seen Dean at some weak points, but it was never bad enough he looked beyond fixing.

His beloved was sitting on the dusty wooden floor, naked and covered in his own blood. His mouth was gagged with a piece of cloth and his hands were tied behind his back. Behind the tears, Cas didn’t know if they were of fear or pain, was a hint of defeat or acceptance. Cas realized that that look came from a place of self-sacrifice. Dean was planning to die for Cas. Unfortunately for Dean, that wasn’t what Cas saw as a great plan.

Castiel quickly took in his surroundings. He noticed that there were no windows, that every surface was covered in sigils and that most of those were painted around Dean.

“Dean” he whispered, “Which one of those sigils are holding back your powers?”

His beloved sighed and shook his head. Then he raised one of his bleeding ankles and said something almost unintelligible.

“Mah mahkih”

 _My markings._ Dean was too hurt to access his powers.

Cas huffed. “Okay, well… Do you know which sigils are trapping you?”

Dean shook his head.

They were both quiet for a while.

“What on earth do they want with you, Dean?”

An eerie voice behind Cas answered, making him startle, “I don’t really want to give away the big ending to you yet, sweetheart, but I can give a hint of what will come next.”

_Oh God in Heaven, please, I beg you to save my love. Holy Michael, please help us defeat this demon._

Cas began trembling, suddenly too scared to even think of another plan.

Azazel moved into Cas’ line of vision. “Poor pretty Christian boy. You know the bible, don’t you? I appear in there as well. Tell me, little boy, how much do you know about demons.”

“You- You once were angels…”

Castiel’s breath hitched, but he continued, “You were punished by- by God and thrown into Hell.”

Azazel softly caressed his cheek and Castiel let out a scared whimper, as he was sure Azazel would hurt him. “Almost true, Castiel. Almost true.”

When Azazel saw that Cas’ eyes were shut in fear, he grabbed the man’s jaw. “Look at me when I’m talking to you, you little whore.”

Immediately the demon’s voice turned back from threatening to condescending. “I’m not gonna tell you the entire story, but I will tell you my name, so you know who you need to beg for mercy.”

Cas’ eyes widened further in fear and they turned to Dean for help. Dean could only stare back in fear. He couldn’t move or even talk.

Azazel looked at the god behind him as well. He spared him a two-second glace, before turning his yellow eyes back to Cas. “He chose this, honestly. He rather had me do this to someone else than to him.” the demon sighed.

Cas wasn’t buying it, which only seemed to amuse Azazel more.

“It’s a shame, though. I was looking forward to making him utter those pretty sounds again, but he wanted me to stop, so now I’ll have to move on to the last in line, which is you, Castiel.”

Behind Azazel, Dean began protesting incomprehensible words and sounds, but the demon ignored him completely.

He moved closer to Cas’ ear and could feel the sulfery breathe tickling in his ear as he spoke. “I’m gonna give you everything you love about Dean. My name is Azazel.”

With the announcement of his name, the demon wanted to get started, but Dean chose that moment to interrupt.

Azazel sighed and removed the cloth with a snap of his fingers.

“Tell me, boy. What is it?”

“If I hand over my powers voluntary, will you leave him alone?”, Dean pleaded.

“Dean! Don’t!”

_Oh God in Heaven, please, I beg you to save my love. Holy Michael, please help us defeat this demon._

Dean had read once that some god could hand over their powers to other beings. If both parties had agreed on that, it would only need a short spell and a drop of blood. Dean knew that this would only work with gods who get their powers from blood, but it might work temporarily and give him and Cas a chance to escape and-

“You know that I can read your mind now, don’t you Dean?” Azazel scowled as he walked over to the god to kick him in the gut, “How stupid do you think I am?”

After enjoying a moment of watching Dean groan in pain, the demon turned back to Castiel, who had trouble breathing normally. Azazel’s wicked grin was still on, but he looked a bit offended.

“You certainly don’t love him for his intelligence, do you Castiel?”

“He’s not stupid.” Cas muttered afraid, but Yellow Eyes ignored his words.

“I know you love his warmth, so I got a little surprise for you, sweetheart.”

Behind the man, a fire started in a small hearth. Azazel walked to flames and scooped one out with his hands. He then returned to the circle of sigils around the god and smudged one of them. Dean immediately felt like he could reach some of the energy from the Earth so he could heal his markings.

“Sweet and pretty Castiel, let’s see how fast your lover can heal himself to save you.”

The smudged sigil was barely enough to heal a small marking. A small marking healed was barely enough to control the fire.

_Oh God in Heaven, please, I beg you to save my love. Holy Michael, please help us defeat this demon._

_Oh God in Heaven, please, I beg you to save my love. Holy Michael, please help us defeat this demon._

_Oh God in Heaven, please, I beg you to save my love. Holy Michael, please-_

Azazel placed the flame on Castiel’s neck and Dean’s heart screamed.

_Please, please, please, please, please-_


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for being gone for so long! Exams are evil, but also over now! I'm hoping to continue next weekend

Cas was already covered in burns when the flame finally flickered and went out. His whimpers of pain and soft sobbing overwhelmed the apologies of the god. Azazel had enjoyed their little exchange. For every burn that Castiel felt on his skin, Dean apologized and repeatedly told the missionary that he was trying his best and that it’ll be over soon.

It hadn’t been soon enough for Castiel. The smell of burned flesh said enough. He couldn’t feel his left hand and the skin of his left leg was probably ruined forever. All the hairs on his legs and arms were gone and his skin felt painfully sensitive. Some places were redder than others, but his face was fine. The man’s eyes were fixated on the corner of the shed.

“Would be a shame to deform that beautiful face, won’t it, Dean? I know how much you enjoy that  mouth.” Azazel had said.

Dean tried to ignore Azazel. All his energy was being spent on keeping the fire extinguished.

“Don’t worry, Dean. I’ve got more than just a little fire.”

Azazel then turned back to Cas “It’s a shame that you can feel some of your limbs right now. I guess your other side just needs to make up for it.”

The _please, stop_ was almost too soft to be heard. Azazel smiled wickedly at Dean while pointing at the god’s lover.

“He’s so adorable, isn’t he, Dean?” the demon said smiling, “You could just squish him between your hands.”

Dean felt Azazel letting go of the flames and the room went almost dark again. The only source of light was the candle on the rotten wooden table behind Cas. Dean felt the pressure in his chest leave. He had had a small chance to heal. Now he just needed to get Cas away from here. He was tied up in a wooden armchair. Maybe if he was able to distract Azazel and then he could burn Cas’ ropes. Cas would still have to run away on his numb leg, but the moment that he would be out of the shed, he would be able to pray to others.

He just hoped the demon was too distracted to read his thoughts right now.

Dean looked up at Cas, but the man had lost consciousness. Maybe that was for the best. Azazel was gathering something to redraw the sigils. Now was his chance! If he could just damage the ropes enough, without them immediately breaking, his love would be free.

He started, but before he even got close to what he wanted, Sam walked in.

Azazel turned away from the small bowl of blood and ash to the younger brother, who’s skin looked more grey than before.

“Sammy! So great to see you again, boy. How was your meal? Did they give you any trouble?”

Sam shook his head and then walked up to Dean. Dean opened his mouth to say something, but the corrupted god stopped him.

“Please, don’t start begging, Dean. It gets old.”

“We can still fix this, Sam. It’s not too late to stop.”

Sam just rolled his eyes. He then noticed the healed markings.

“Why’d you break the sigils?” he asked the yellow-eyed demon as he pulled out a knife.

Azazel just shrugged and leaned back at the table.

“Torture.” he simply said.

Sam nodded and returned to cutting the markings open, even the ones that just stopped bleeding, but hadn’t healed. While Sam was cutting, Dean tried to use the last portion to break Cas’ binds. Halfway through that process, Cas woke up again because of Dean’s groans of pain.

“Sam! Stop it, please!”, the deep voice of Castiel sounded through the shed.

Sam briefly looked back at Cas, before returning to cutting Dean up. The older god made eye contact with Cas, but the human didn’t get the signal that he should keep quiet. It would be so much safer for him if he would just keep quiet.

“You don’t have a home to go back to.” Sam simply said. It was a statement. It was a _just letting you_ _know_ statement.

Cas needed a second to process that.

“Jimmy?” He then asked heartbrokenly. Sam nodded without looking back.

“Claire?” Sam nodded again.

Cas almost choked on his tears. “Am- Amelia?”

“No, not that one.”, Sam said, but before a bitter relief could wash over Castiel’s face, he huffed.

“Of course her too. She’s the one that opened the door for me.”

“Sam is lying! They’re alive! I’m sure of it!” Dean interrupted, but his brother was quick to make another cut.

_Oh God in Heaven, please, I beg you to save my love. Holy Michael, please help us defeat this demon._

“God ain’t here, pretty.” Azazel cooed, “So you can stop praying.”

Cas did immediately.

Azazel took Castiel’s hand in his. Cas looked up in fear.

“Poor thing. You’re so alone right now. No one to help you. No one to save you…”

The demon dug the sharp tip of his index finger into Cas’ ring finger nail. Cas screamed. Azazel calmly curved his finger, so the nail was being pulled out of its bed.

Dean felt tears well up in his uninjured eye.

“Sammy, please, stop this madness.”

“No, Dean. I’d rather continue.” he said as he looked over his shoulder, “That reminds me that your nails are technically markings as well, even though they don’t do anything.”

Sam hauled him up and went behind the pillar to remove the god’s nails, but Dean quickly kicked back against Sam’s knee. Sam’s knife had been close to his hands. If he had reacted just a bit quicker, he could’ve grabbed it.

Sam swore and jabbed the knife into Dean’s arm, pinning it to the wooden pillar.

“Dean!”

“I’m fine, Cas. I’m fine.” he said through gritted teeth.

Sam huffed. “You’re definitely not fine.” It sounded remarkably concerned, but before he could think about what it meant, he felt Sam starting to pull his thumbnail.

“Don’t worry, Cas. It’ll be over soon. I’ll get you out of here.”

Cas surprised him as well as Azazel as he mumbled. “You need saving as well, Dean.”

 

With only ten nails to pull, because Cas didn’t feel his left limbs anyway, Azazel finished quicker than Sam. The demon left Cas to silently sob and went to look at how Dean’s hands were doing. Cas was looking at the corner again.

Bad. They were doing bad. They hurt. And every time Dean tried to pull away his left arm, he felt the knife moving in his flesh. It also didn’t help that Sam was being extra slow. Not to be evil, but just because he had never done this before.

Dean had never stopped reassuring Cas that they would get out of there, but he slowly began to repeat it for his own sake as well. He was so, so incredibly afraid.

Then, as his last nail was removed from his hands, Azazel stopped Sam from continuing on Dean’s feet.

“I think we need so more chains for his legs. You got some good ones at your house, don’t you, Sammy? Let’s go get those.”

Sam shrugged and nodded in agreement and followed the demon outside.

“Dean?” Cas asked weakly, but Dean was so happy to hear his voice.

“I’m so sorry, Cas”

Cas sighed bitterly. “It’s fine. You didn’t know this would happen.”

“It’s not fine. You don’t deserve this.” Dean muttered.

“Neither do you!” Cas shot back.

The pair is quiet for a second.

“I think I felt you burning the ropes. Do you want me to escape now or later?”

Dean nodded “Now. You need to go immediately.”

“I can’t leave you!”

“You have to!”

Cas pressed his lips together, trying not to cry. He then began moving his arms back and forth so the last bit of rope would crumble off. Quickly untying his legs, he limped to Dean.

Dean shook his head.

“I can’t even leave this circle, Cas. You gotta get out of here and pray to dad or mom or- I don’t care. Gabriel or Emma!”

Castiel was shaking. “Promise me, you won’t die.”

Dean sighed, “I promise.”

Limping towards his love would take up too much time so he simply went to the corner of the shed where he was looking at earlier.

“Cas? What are you doing?”

“The wood here is more rotten. All I need to do is-”

He kneeled and pushed his shoulder against it. A hole emerged.

He turned back one more time.

“I love you. Don’t die.”

And he was gone.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I AM GOING TO FINISH THIS

I took long for Azazel and Sam to figure out that Cas had escaped. Dean was sure he had passed out at least three times and didn’t know exactly how much time had passed since he had last opened his eyes.

 Sam had walked in first. If it hadn’t been for the grave situation Dean would’ve laughed at his face for sure. After standing in the door opening with eyes like saucers for a second he turned his gaze to Dean.

“Azazel! Castiel escaped!” Sam yelled as he walked up to his brother.

“Where is he?”

Dean looked up at him.

“Gone.” he mumbled. He suddenly realized how lonely he was. Insecurities started eating at him. What if Castiel ran and never came back? What he returned to wherever he lived before coming here? What if he didn’t really love-

Wow… Where did that come from?

When Azazel marched in he already had a knife in hand and pushed Sam out of the way to get to Dean. His eyes spat fire as he grabbed him by his throat.

“You little shit! Where is he?”

“Gone.” he said again.

Azazel got too close again. It scared Dean.

“So we underestimated you, didn’t we?”

Dean couldn’t help but disagree. He was without powers and he felt incredibly weak. Not just physically, but it was like his mind was shackled.

Cas is the one who they underestimated, not Dean.

Azazel growled. “The bitch probably thinks he’s safe now.”

Dean felt a distant anger forming, but somehow he couldn’t channel it. Sam, however, seemed to get madder by the second.

The demon marched up to the door. “I’m going to look for that stupid thing and when I find him, I’ll rape him raw!”

Out of nowhere, Sam began kicking Dean until the elder god began to dry heave.  

Dean lost track of what was happening to him. Sam was kicking, choking and beating Dean all at the same time somehow and spitting words like useless, worthless and weak at him.

“Sammy-”

Sam broke his nose.

“Please-”

Sam kicked him in the groin.

“Cas! Save-”

Sam punched his jaw.

“Save Cas! Please!”

His bruises had bruises and various bones were nothing but dust now. Dean lost consciousness with another knee to his temple.

 

_Dear God in heaven, I pray to you. Please help my beloved. I know he isn’t your charge, but I’ve always been devoted to you. I don’t know what has happened to my family, but if Sam is right then Dean is all I have left. Though I pray that it is just lies, Dean needs help first. Please let Michael destroy the demon. Please let Raphael heal my love. Please let Gabriel help his family._

 

Gabriel was a good guy okay. A very good guy. So when he heard someone pray to him, he would come visit them. It obviously rarely happened because, hello, trickster. He can put himself on airplane mode whenever he wishes.

That he arrived at the one who prayed too late, well, that wasn’t his fault. When a nymph tells you she can go all week long, I’d be rude to only stay for three days and it would be even ruder to stop and listen to missed messages.

Besides, he never got any prayers anyway. Humans can’t pray to him and his god-friends never need to pray.

He assumed that being able to hear Castiel pray to him came from the same reason that Castiel can sometimes hear prayers meant for Dean: God juice.

He immediately got the chills from seeing Dean’s home again. It looked too empty and too quiet. Normally you would at least hear the animals while approaching, but even they were quiet.

What the fuck was going on?


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> WE'RE. GOING. TO. FINISH. THIS.  
> HI hello. Missed me? Good.
> 
> The story's not done yet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TAGS TAGS TAGS LOOK AT THEM   
> (See endnotes for trigger warning)

Dean was being dragged somewhere, his bloody heels scraping over the forest floor. He could feel an energy growing, big, evil and consuming, but he could not determine from where. When the arms supporting him disappeared, Dean fell on the floor like a ragdoll.

“Dean, wake up!” A sneer from the darkness surrounding him.

It didn’t sound like a sneer though. A cry? Was the person yelling sad? Hopeless? Angry? What is happening?

“Wake up, please!”

Dean saw light. Warm bright light. A little too bright perhaps.

“Open your eyes!”

Sammy?

Dean opened his eyes –he had seen the light already? Weren’t they already open?- and saw the grey face of his brother looming over him. Fresh blood dripped from his mouth, but his eyes were concerned.

“Cas will be back soon. You’ll be okay. I promise.”

Dean closed his eyes again. They had captured Cas again! He should do something! He should punch Sam knock-out and run for help…

The dark feeling of helplessness overcame him again, so he just closed his eyes and let the world be.

 

Dean woke up again. He was confused and felt weirdly distant from the world. Everything was out of his control. He was playing chess with someone, but not allowed to touch his own pieces. It didn’t feel like he woke up at all, more like he was falling asleep or maybe just like he was falling. Every sense came back to him distorted. Dean fought it. He’d rather be falling and revisit the nightmare that was his reality. A kick to the side of his face forced him to try.

A sensation. Headache, stomachache, everythingache. Liquids, probably red ones, streaming down all over his body.

A smell. His nose was broken, so it was mostly blood, but also sweat, charcoal, grass, and mold.

A sight. His one good eye barely opened, but he saw that it was dark outside. He was tied to one of the trees on the edge of the clearing. There was a skilfully engraved stone slab in front of him. It looked familiar. On the edge of that stone slab, two people.

No. His vision slowly cleared up. He didn’t want to see it. He didn’t need to see to know what was happening.

Sound. Wet sounds. Flesh hitting flesh. Castiel crying. Weeping. Begging for the demon to stop. Begging for Dean to save him. The demon saying cruel things to him.

Then, his own voice, rough from being punched in the throat and quivering with fear.

“Please, stop.”

 

The wet sounds continued and became more frequent. Castiel heard him and began sobbing his name more. Azazel wasn't raping Cas for his own sexual pleasure. His only goal was to break him, and so, break Dean. His voice wasn’t even affected.

“Is that how you’re gonna save him, Dean? By begging me to stop?”

The demon came and let go of Castiel, who when no longer held up by Azazel slipped off the edge and fell down on the ground. His legs were bent in weird ways and because his face was turned to Dean, the god could see half of his face was mutilated. One eye cried tears and the other one, a gaping socket, cried blood.

The man was whimpering. “God please Dean Please.”

Sam emerged from Dean’s left. He looked as vengeful and worried as Dean assumed he should be feeling right now. He barely felt anything, but still, he was crying.

Cas too.

And there was nothing that Dean could do about it.

 

Sam walked over to Azazel and Castiel. For a second he actually believed that his baby brother would save Cas for him, but no.

In one aggressive swoop, Sam picked up Castiel and threw him onto the slab of stone again. Ever-grinning Azazel walked over to the opposite end of the offering-table and hammered Castiel's hands to the table, metal nails defying ancient stone.

Castiel screamed.

Dean began to struggle again, but the roped they've used only seemed to constrict tighter and tighter around his stomach.

Sam began to chant.

"Cas! I'm sorry!" he called.

Azazel began to laugh.

Castiel looked at Dean. The half of his mouth that was still recognizable as a mouth formed a helpless "please".

 

Dean had missed the part where Azazel had grabbed a knife. Dean was still focussed on Castiel's face. They were making eye-contact. 

"I'm so sorry, Cas"

He tried to answer, but suddenly Castiel's body stiffened. His eye turned desperate. His throat seemed to be stuck. His chest had a knife in it.

The knife was pulled out.

"Cas!"

The knife was stabbed back in.

"Please!"

The knife was pulled back out.

Castiel looked at him.

"Dean" His last word.

"NO!" 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Sam was by his side in the light.

"Dean?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cas gets raped in this chapter. Also further mutilation to the face and body. Also, Cas dies. If I missed anything let me know I'll add.  
> |  
> Thanks for reading!  
> |  
> |  
> |  
> SPOILERS!vvvvvv  
> Cas is dead until the next chapter.  
> I do happy endings and I have a strict no MCD policy.

**Author's Note:**

> Comments give me life! And would really like to keep on living


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